The word “no” has been fed to us verbally since the time we are little. No touching, no running, no sweets before dinner. While it may seem harsh, this is our introduction to learning boundaries.
However, as we get older, if we still receive more no’s than yesses in life, it not only brings us down, but can affect daily life negatively. This is where the negativity begins taking over our moods and enthusiasm.
Being a yes person all the time has its drawbacks too. The often-daunting speed of modern-day life makes it tempting to run in a default mode. A yes to everything to everyone. However, recently our society has had to adjust to a lot of no’s again. But now, more than ever, we should use this time to start saying yes again. Yes, to the people and things that are healthy for our wellbeing, both mentally and physically.
It is okay to ask for help – Though it may seem easier to do everything yourself, from cooking dinner to helping your partner with choosing the right outfit for their meeting, it simply is not beneficial for either of you. Work with your partner, not for them.
If you know you’re going to have a long day with certain errands, ask for help. If it is necessary, try eliminating one of your “wants” for the day. If you can not get to that bubble bath tonight, try a hot shower and treat yourself to a ‘me’ day on your day off.
- Take time to call – While it is a lot easier to text and post on each other’s profiles, there is nothing as personal as picking up the phone and talking, especially where we are in a time of social distancing. The “your turn, my turn” set-up of electronic correspondence makes the spontaneous flow of interaction difficult.
Taking the time to interact and hear each other’s voices, gives us the sense of belonging to each other again. In fact, talking to someone leads to feeling cathartic. Catharsis refers to the feeling of relief, of letting go. While the situation at hand perhaps has not changed, talking about it … “drained off some of the pain and this brings relief.”
- Purge your electronics – While it has become almost impossible to put down all the electronic devices, a brief break will help you refocus on the crucial things that are going on with your life away from the multiple devices.
Instead of watching a movie at the end of the night, play cards or put together a puzzle. Treat yourself to a healthy snack and remember that the world will still be there in the morning.
- Go after your passion — Have you always wanted to learn how to speak a new language or perhaps learn how to salsa dance? Having and accessing hobbies is healthy for you in more ways than one.
When we practice a new skill, we begin feeling more accomplished and less timid. Hobbies promote better health and may even lower the risk of having high blood pressure. Enjoying a few hours each week on your hobbies can also reduce the risk of depression and dementia.
- De-clutter your personal space – Nothing can be as overwhelming as chores. From the piled-up dirty laundry to mowing the lawn. As time passes, the piles grow bigger and the negative feelings take over. Stop thinking of it all at once. Make yourself a “to-do” list. One chore at a time, each day. Before you know it, your home will be cleaner, and your mind can rest easy.
Overall conclusion – Find the ways that work for you. Practice daily. Be thankful and be the reason someone is thankful for you. As the world-renowned poet William Morris once said, “The true secret of happiness lies in the taking a genuine interest in all the details of daily life.”