There are many schools of thought when it comes to how each parents decides to raise a child. I am pleased to see that our political situation has finally caught up with the 21^st Century allowing same sex couples and enabling all adults to provide children with a safe and happy home. 

Children are delicate

and it doesn’t take much to knock their confidence or bruise their ego. As a parent or guardian it can be incredibly disheartening to watch the cruel world affect your child. So how can you help give your child their confidence back?

Anyone with, or working with children, will tell you their natural inclination is to tell the child that whatever was said to them was very wrong and they should ignore it. You’re correct but as an adult, we know, it is almost impossible to ignore things that are difficult to hear and we are able to rationalise these thoughts much more easily than a child. Below are a few suggestions that may help you support your child through a delicate time.

• Talk through situations with him/her. Developing the ability to rationalise will really help them especially when it comes to the things they may not always want to discuss.

• Sharing your own experiences can help but be selective. Anything starting with ‘in my day’ probably isn’t going to help much.

• Provide your child with a situation or scenario in which they can prove themselves. More often than not the child will complete the task or say the ‘correct’ thing. At which point you can point out what they have achieved and s/he will walk away with a very large grin.

• Allow for discovery and independence. No matter how much each parent would love to stand by his or her child for each battle. You are not always going to be present. Sometimes time is enough.

• If a child is finding their confidence is being knocked because they struggle in school always ensure they have access to other outlets. More schools are encouraging sports, activities and schemes such as Forest School as they promote independence and can support those children to develop alternative skills much like they will in their working lives.

• As above access to other outlets also enables children to have multiple groups of friends. A child is now surrounded by social media and for them, there really is no escape. Having more than one friendship group can help neutralise the situation and release a little bit of personal pressure.

• Make sure your child is educated when it comes to how to deal with social media. Ensure that your suggestions are realistic but clear. There are many websites and books that can help you get this message across particularly if the child is a little younger.

Hopefully some of these points will help to spark an idea or allow you to do a little bit more research. It is a terribly difficult situation to be in and you will inevitably know what is best for your child but seeking alternative advice can really help to gain insight into the very open and connected world your child is living in.

by Sophie