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self-confidence

    Self-Confidence

    The Gender Revolution

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    By Sophie. Recently I read an article showing the latest fashion campaign using Jaden Smith (Will Smith’s son) as a gender-neutral model. Jaden is now the face of the Louis Vuitton’s women wear. So I decided to look into the positive impact that gender discussion is having on the world.

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    Self-Confidence

    Radiate: The Importance of Being Seen

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    Shy brothers and sisters, this one is for you.

    There’s great value to be mined from the quiet individual … the meditative recluse … the contemplative outsider. I have always innately trusted shy people just a little bit more than the boisterous, bombastic type. They’re genuine. There’s nothing to hide because there is no facade. Quiet individuals have nothing to prove, no one to prove it to, and are content simply living their lives to the fullest for their own enrichment.

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    Self-Confidence

    Positive Mindset

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    Having a positive attitude helps you get along through both your highs and lows in life. When you maintain a positive mindset, you exude confidence and people are attracted to you; they crave for your company and want to be like you. Why not set yourself a glowing and leading example for others?

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    Self-Confidence

    Positive Thinking Leads to Positive Outcomes

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    Positive thinking does create positive outcomes. But not everyone believes that. Some people think positive outcomes are only dictated based on how much effort you put into something. And, while effort counts, how great of an outcome can you have if you think miserably along the journey to that outcome?

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    Self-Confidence

    How to Resist Peer Pressure

     

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    I know peer pressure sounds a bit high-school. It is because we experience it mostly during our high-school years. But don’t deny it that it still gets you now in your college life, at work, or even over the Internet. I know ’cause I feel it too. The only reason why we feel pressured is because we always want to “belong” or to blend in wherever we are. That’s human instinct. But if handled incorrectly it sometimes places us at risk for bad outcomes. With that being said, here is my Five Ways to Resist Peer Pressure.

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    Self-Confidence

    Why Doubting Makes You Stronger

     


    In a world craving for security and certainty, doubting (yourself) is an unwelcome but inescapable reality. It brings fear of the unknown, negativity and paralyzing thoughts. But it doesn’t have to spell disaster. What if doubt could make you even stronger and wiser?
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    Self-Confidence

    Steps to Improving Self-Image

     

    There are some simple things you can try

    Being critical of your body is one of the hardest things to overcome. We tend to be our biggest competitors, which has its pros and cons. It’s great to strive to be better, but being overly critical to ourselves will only set us back.

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    Self-Confidence

    How To Make Friends When You’re Anxious

    friendsThere are lots of sayings about friends and friendships but one I like is, the road to friend’s house is never long. To me it conveys an important sentiment, which is the making of friends is actually a lot easier and closer to hand than some people might think. Read more

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    Self-Confidence

    Improving a Child’s Confidence

     

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    There are many schools of thought when it comes to how each parents decides to raise a child. I am pleased to see that our political situation has finally caught up with the 21st Century allowing same sex couples and enabling all adults to provide children with a safe and happy home.  Read more

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    Relationships

    Abusive Relationships: Spotting One Then Moving On

    assertionIf only some relationships came with a preview button. Most of us aspire to be in blissful and fulfilling relationships but sometimes it doesn’t turn out that way. The fantasy starts to go sour and elements of doubt start to creep in.

    Is this normal? Is my relationship very different to others? Those few telltale signs of unpleasantness from our partner can be brushed aside. At first there’s the thought it’s just teething issues, that somehow with a little time and effort we’re are capable of changing them. But how do we spot the signs of a relationship that’s mildly out of kilter with one that bears the hallmarks of abuse? Well there are signs:

    Jealousy

    Jealousy or envy is a part of the human condition and anyone who has an investment in a relationship is likely to want to guard and protect it. However, when jealousy reaches a point where it starts to dictate the thoughts and actions of your partner then the relationship is on shaky ground.

    A jealous partner will often mask their behaviour as caring whereas it’s actually possessive and controlling. A major component of any successful relationship is trust. When your partner has to always watch you, track or question you on a daily basis, it shows they cannot now, and maybe never will, fully trust you.

    Power Struggles

    Does your partner seem focused on winning those little arguments you keep having rather than conjuring up a solution? The end product of an argument in a relationship should be to reach consensus. If either of you sets out to win arguments then the relationship loses in the long run.

    Healthy relationships are not about the individual. They are about striking a balance that works for both people. If one partner is always trying to be in control then the relationship is based on selfishness and a lack of empathy.

    Passive Aggression

    Many people think an abusive relationship is defined by physical aggression, but this isn’t the case. Mental abuse can be metered out in various ways. It erodes and undermines self-confidence. An example of this is passive aggression which relates to all those actions that show or reveal displeasure but somehow seem to skirt around the central issues. Passive aggression can be shown through a pattern of indifference, apathy, forgetfulness, lateness, withdrawing from contact and a generally negative approach towards a relationship. When your partner holds back from stating how they stand on issues affecting the relationships, then they are being part of the problem. If the person you are in a relationship with does not feel the need to tell you what they want then it is unfair to you.

    A lack of proper communication is a major sign of a toxic relationship because issues are never properly resolved and the relationship cannot go forward. If your partner is passive aggressive you will develop resentment and unhappiness in the relationship. It means they are giving up without really making any effort.

    Fatigue

    If you are always mentally exhausted whenever you are around your partner then that relationship is toxic. In a healthy relationship, everyday challenges should be enjoyable because your partner is not in control of your happiness. Constant negative criticism and put-downs result in an inability to be comfortable with yourself and around your partner. It causes a simmering resentment. In a relationship partners should be able to change and grow without fear of judgment.

    Selfishness

    You too have feelings, of course you do, but your partner won’t hear them or finds ways of sidelining them. You find you are not able to have a conversation that is two sided, where your opinion can also be heard, respected and considered. Instead of considering your feelings, he/she battles with you until they can have the last word and chalk up a hollow victory. Alternatively, they agree with everything you say and make promises that are rarely or grudgingly kept.

    You Aren’t You Anymore

    Whenever you try to grow or at least improve yourself your partner responds with disbelief or mockery. You find you don’t receive any support or encouragement for your efforts. Instead, they question why you are bothering and keep on judging you by insisting that you will never grow or become any different than you are now.

    What to Do?

    Every situation is different so there are no absolutes. There are however some general principles or guidelines that might help guide your actions:

    1. If you are in a relationship that exhibits some or most of these warning signs then time apart may be necessary for a thorough self-evaluation. Space can provide a breathing space and a way to reflect on whether your relationship is predominately harmful or not.
    2. If you decide it is time to break off the relationship try to stay positive about other aspects of life and give yourself time to heal. Avoid rushing into another relationship to fill the void that is left.
    3. Clear some physical space. Letting go is very important so once you’ve made your decision it’s time to live and work with it. Cut them out of your life by removing texts, contacts, and social media contacts. This can be a tough time because you may find you share friends. Be ruthless with those ‘friends’ who gossip and are probably working between you and your ex.
    4. Beginning filling the void of your old relationship with new activities and making new connections.
    5. Know your value. Remind yourself why you’ve made those decisions, as tough as they may have been. You are a unique individual with the right to happiness and growth.
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