Are you sabotaging your own happiness? One way to find out is to take our happiness quiz. Do you ever feel like you’ve been brought up to be a people pleaser?
This is something many people, women especially, often feel. Perhaps you were brought up to be nice and polite to other people, to respect your elders, and to put your own needs behind those of other people. If this sounds like you then the chances are your own happiness has been compromised.
Many of us have a tendency to put the brakes on what we say and do in order not to hurt other person’s feelings. You must have bitten your tongue so many times in your attempts not to offend and portray yourself as a person who is nice and likeable. It comes at quite a cost. It must be doubly frustrating when you look around at other people who seem to be well liked, admired and yet who don’t seem to have to make the same effort.
Well the good news is you can change and we hope our happiness quiz may be a good place to start. If what you’ve just been reading resonates with you it means you already have a required level of insight into your own thought processes. This means, with a few tweaks, you can adapt your way of thinking and your behaviour to turn things to your advantage. Now use the happiness quiz to find out whether or not things are as bad as you’re wondering. The happiness quiz will help to illuminate the extent to which your own thought processes may be impeding your own happiness:
Get a pen and some paper and jot down your answers. Read each statement and make and decide whether option a, b or c comes the closest. Don’t look for an exact fit, just select the option you feel comes closest to your likely reaction or response:
Q1. You’re drinking some red wine, or maybe a coffee, and you spill the contents onto the carpet, do you:
a. Find some excuse to hide in the bathroom or leave early.
b. Grab club soda and paper towels to soak up the stain.
c. Tell everyone you’re such an idiot and keep apologising.
Q2. You lost out on a promotion, do you:
a. Feel angry and frustrated because you knew this was likely to happen.
b. Shrug it off because you never expected be promoted anyway.
c. Chalk it up to experience because another opportunity will come your way soon enough.
Q3. If you spend out on yourself, do you:
a. Feel awkward and selfish.
b. Feel good, because you deserve it/
c. Feel hollow and guilty, because you spend money on yourself to fill a void.
Q4. You’re given a gift don’t want, do you:
a. Give it away, it’s no big deal.
b. Keep it, just in case they came over and ask to see it.
c. Complain that you can’t believe you were given such a thing.
Q5. If you make a mistake, does the voice inside your head say:
a. Oh well, I will do better the next time.
b. I am so stupid for doing that.
c. Not again, why do I keep making mistakes.
Q6. When a friend has overstepped the line, do you:
a. Rip into them and get them to promise it will never happen again.
b. Tell them how it makes you feel, explain why its not acceptable to you.
c. Keep quiet for fear of creating a bad feeling or an argument.
Q7. When you receive a compliment, do you:
a. Graciously say thank you, and feel good about yourself.
b. Feel awkward, say thanks, change the subject.
c. Reject the compliment by saying it isn’t accurate or deserved.
Okay – that’s the happiness quiz done. Now check your results:
- Your thoughts are telling you that your sense of self is easily threatened, and you need to start working on your self-esteem. You run away from problems instead of dealing with them.
- You are a great problem solver, and your thoughts will assist you in getting what you want.
- Apologizing is a nice way to say that it was an accident, however profusely apologizing is an indication that you take on more responsible than necessary. Your thoughts are giving you more guilt than needed.
- You must change your thought process now! When your thoughts are negative, and you feel like you don’t have a good support system your thoughts will create that. Keep your thoughts positive!
- Your thoughts are keeping you safe. However staying in a safe mode, and not taking risks will leave you in a rut. Start thinking about a little risk taking.
- Your thoughts are right on target. It’s normal to feel a little disappointed, and it is healthy to get ready for the next opportunity.
- Thoughts that make you feel like you don’t deserve will keep you in a guilty mode. Start changing those thoughts to deserving ones.
- You thoughts are saying that you deserve to have nice things. Appropriately staying in your budget, and rewarding yourself now and again is healthy, and keeps you control.
- There is good news and bad news. The bad news is that having thoughts of guilt, and filling yourself up because you “need” something can be very damaging and destructive. The good news is that you now know this and, you can start to do something about it immediately. Change your thoughts to those that bring you a sense of self-worth, and start to see how you can fulfill your needs in the appropriate manner.
- Doing what you feel, and acting appropriate is healthy and smart. Why make a mountain out of a mole hill? Take care of the issue, and move forward.
- Your thoughts are keeping you in fearful state of mind. What if they should come by and ask to see their gift? The what ifs in life are very limiting. Release fearful thoughts, and do what is best for you.
- Your thoughts are keeping you in a victim position. Complaining and gossiping are sure ways to remain unhappy, and you can be certain you will get more of the same…negativity. Break that cycle now!
- Knowing that you have made a mistake and not “beating” yourself up over it is great! We all make mistakes, and when we learn from them and intend to do better the next time we will actually get wiser and more experienced. Your thoughts are in the right place.
- If you thoughts are punishing you, you will have a hard time learning, and you won’t try something new again for fear of failure. Release those kinds of thoughts and start working on self-confidence.
- Your thoughts are keeping you from learning from past mistakes, and you can be sentenced to a very long time of unhappiness. Observe and learn, it makes life a lot easier.
- You have thoughts of rage and anger. This is not necessarily the best way to handle problems. You need to figure out why you are so angry and resolve those feelings.
- Thoughts that help you problem-solve and communicate in a calm and mature way is the best bet. You can save friendships, and enforce your boundaries that will assure you happiness, and you will gain the respect of others too.
- Your thoughts are keeping you from facing the real issue. You don’t like confrontation, and hope the problem just goes away. Unless you start thinking about problem solving methods, the problem won’t go away, it will only get bigger.
- Accepting a compliment graciously means your thoughts are giving you a balanced sense self-esteem, humility, and ego. Way to go!
- Your thoughts need a little improvement. Your thoughts are saying thank you which means you believe the compliment; however changing the subject is telling you that you are uncomfortable with the attention.
- You are a willing victim. Your thoughts are keeping you in a martyr state of mind. This is not a recipe for happiness. Change that pattern pronto!
The happiness quiz is just a quiz, but we hope you enjoyed it and that it has at least stimulated your thoughts about your own situation and your own happiness.