We all get impatient at times, especially in our fast-paced world.
In fact, new neuro-scientific evidence proves that the hurried, multi-tasking world we interact within has fundamentally rewired our brains to expect instant gratification, or at least quick results.
This means that patience is becoming less the norm.
Our brains were originally wired to keep moving so that we weren’t in danger of being eaten by larger mammals. Our fight or flight response served us well in prehistoric times.
But now, our brains have rewired themselves to expect things and people to move even faster…and not for important reasons like survival.
Why patience is still important
Now, we want to do everything as quickly as possible so that we can keep up with the Jones, stay ahead at work, get as much done as possible each day…and then drop into our beds, exhausted.
This lifestyle not only kills our peace of mind, it also negatively impacts our physical health, spiritual health and relationships. We have less time for our families, so we put high demands on them to hurry them along.
But instead of doing that, it seems to make things worse–they slow down. But is this only our perception?
When we are impatient, we tend to overdramatize the importance of whatever event or location we are rushing to.
- We blow things out of proportion.
- make mountains out of molehills.
- put the importance of getting, doing and having above that of our loved ones.
We judge people who “stop and smell the roses” as wimps who can’t take the pressure of the modern world or as lazy because they aren’t struggling and doing, doing, doing like everyone else.
What does impatience get us?
- Common road rage
- High divorce rates
- Stress-induced illnesses
- Raising rates of depression and anxiety, even in our youth
- More people dying from heart attacks
- Materialism that sucks our souls dry
- Pushing our children to succeed at everything
- People “going postal”
- More violence
- More drugs
Impatience causes stress. Now, stress is a part of life that we can’t get away from. And, believe it or not, some stress is healthy for us. We all get stressed out.
What’s important is how we deal with that stress that matters.
Do we come home and yell at the kids because our boss has been breathing down our neck at work?
Whether we kick the dog because our kid didn’t take out the trash…again?
Do we drive too close to the car in front of us because we have so much to do at the office that we are trying to get in early?
Impatience has been linked to high blood pressure, artery plaque buildup, heart disease and heart attacks. It can cause anxiety. It can break down relationships.
It can cause people to avoid us because they get tired of being ridiculed when our expectations not being met. All in all, our hyper-paced world isn’t as great as we have built it up to be.
Patience is a skill
No one is always patient. We all have things that trigger us to lose our patience from time to time. It may be technology that doesn’t work as it should, inconsiderate drivers or our kids who piddle around and make us late for work on a regular basis.
But, patience is a skill you can develop if you want to live a happier, more peaceful life. The first step is to notice what triggers your impatience and to begin to notice how it causes you to react. These techniques can help you start to recognize what triggers your impatience.
- Keep a journal or a simple list of all the times you get impatient over a few days.
- Notice if you tend to get more impatient when there are physical issues such as being hungry, thirsty or sleep deprived. These are things that can be easily remedied to prevent a lot of impatient behavior.
- Ask your friends and family what they notice about what triggers your impatience. If you are around them a lot, they will probably be able to list off things you hadn’t considered.
- Notice how you feel the next time you are impatient. More than likely, you’re not going to feel great. You might feel anxiety or angry. Your heart may race, your temperature may rise and your breath become shallow, for example.
Once you have a better understanding of what makes you feel impatient and how you feel when you are, you can start to take action to improve your patience and your life.
How do we develop patience?
Impatience is defined as being unwilling to wait; intolerance with anything that causes delay or hinders desired results. On a daily basis we:
- compare ourselves to others.
- we cling onto outcomes.
- there’s a believe, or hope, we know what’s best.
- we exaggerate the importance of too many things.
We have to deal with impatient people by:
- not belittling their feelings
- asking how we can help
- taking a break
- explaining how their impatience affects you.
Understanding these issues already gives us a head start with patience, and this allows us to:
- live more slowly
- cultivate loving relationships
- enjoy the anticipation
- dream bigger
- make better decisions
- have better health
- worry less
- develop gratitude
Patience helps us take care of ourselves
When we practice patience with ourselves, we allow ourselves the space and time needed to learn and grow into our potential without beating ourselves up. We understand we don’t have to rush everywhere all the time–we eat when we are hungry, rest when we are tired, and take care of our emotions instead of rushing through life.
Patience helps us make better decisions
When we take the time needed to ponder our options, we make better, more informed decisions. We don’t just jump to conclusion and accept whatever option presents itself first. We consider the big picture instead of what will make us happy immediately.
Patience allows us to tap into our intuition
When we take the time to tap into the natural, innate wisdom we have within us, we can more easily receive the messages it is there to communicate to us. This makes for a more joyful, peaceful life…one with fewer regrets.
Patience helps us build stronger relationships
When we practice patience with those in our lives, we demonstrate our love and appreciation for them. When we let impatience rule our lives, we are irritable and hard to please, which leaves others feeling hurt and taken advantage of. Practicing patience helps us nurture our relationships with family, friends, coworkers, children and romantic partners.
Patience helps us appreciate the journey
When we slow down to the speed of life, we enjoy things more. It’s hard to enjoy the small, meaningful things in life when you are always rushing by them. Taking the time to enjoy each day and what it has to offer makes the journey to our destination–whatever that might be–more joyful and peaceful.
In the course
– the power of patience
– patience in relationships
– patience in health & mental health
– misconceptions in patience
– impatience triggers & symptoms
– techniques to develop patience
– regaining perspectives
– appreciating success
– practicing gratitude
– being mindful
– self acceptance
– when we should practice patience
– patience at work & home
– making changes
– letting go of the illusion of control
This course may be taken online and/or downloaded in eBook (.pdf) format
How long do I have access to the course?
Forever! Once you’ve enrolled and paid, you’ll have access to the course material for as long as you need. So devour it all in one weekend or take things slow. It’s your choice!
I still have a question, can I contact you?
Always! You can contact me here, or via the courses site at any time.
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